Does Trump Want To Pay White People $5,000 To Have Babies?

The Donald is Wildin’!

Donald Trump wants babies. He wants babies for Americans. How is this even possible? Well, word on the street is that he’s prepared to start paying families $5,000 to have babies. As you know, fewer and fewer people are getting married — and even fewer are having children. What a conundrum when you’re trying to grow the economy with people. But I digress.

Let’s break this down a little bit.

As Americans are hit harder with economic hardships, this idea pops up. I’m not sure how it makes sense — but I think I know what’s going on. First of all, let’s get the elephant front and center: statistically speaking, America is on track to become browner than ever before. In fact, Latino folks are now the largest minority group, reproducing even more than Black people. On top of that, white people are reproducing less than ever. For a white supremacist, this is a nightmare. They might as well start wearing hats that say “Make America White Again.” The only problem is, America was never a white-only country.

As I see it, some people will be dumb enough to have babies based on a $5,000 incentive. Why? Because they think they can get that money and run — not even thinking about how much babies and kids really cost! Sure, some may see it as a helpful incentive to get their family started. But if you’re like me, thinking about college, sports fees, and all the books and supplies kids need, you’re gonna pause and reflect.

Now there’s even more to this than I’m saying. Have you seen the movie Idiocracy? It’s a dystopian comedy that paints a bleak vision of the future. In one scene, an educated couple debates having kids and ultimately decides it’s never the right time because the world isn’t perfect. Meanwhile, a very dumb couple just keeps popping out babies with no thought at all. Eventually, they outnumber the intelligent folks. Why? Because they just do it without thinking.

I think that’s what Donald Trump is trying to do. He wants to encourage the less educated to have more kids. They’re easier to influence, easier to control, and they fuel the economy without challenging the system. A nation of idiots? That’s what he wants, in my opinion.

To be fair, other countries have launched similar programs. In fact, I think he stole it from Muammar Gaddafi, who gave Libyan women $5,000 (US dollars equivalent) for herself and the newborn. But this Trump thing just feels… different. Do you really think Donald Trump wants more Black babies and Latino babies? I don’t. He runs on a platform of nationalism and it sure doesn’t feel like this energy is directed toward anyone with melanin in their skin.